Beyond Redemption

Today’s Confession…

I hate emulation. Hate it with a passion, especially when I’m the one being emulated. I hate seeing people, particularly “friends”, making a concerted effort to copy me or imitate things they’ve seen me do. I try really hard to be original. If you’ve been with me a while, you’ve seen that. I don’t want what YOU have. I’m perfectly fine striking out on my own and doing things my own way, regardless of whether it’s considered a “hit” or a “miss”.

It’s called being a leader and not a follower.

I do my best to stay away from patterns and stuff that others use, particularly in fandom. Hate my style, or love my style, there is no doubt that it’s MY style because I’ve been doing what I do long before others came along, following in my footsteps. From my nicknames, to my personal site, to the kind of fanart that I commission, to whom I commission, to the way I write a story -I don’t do what others do. I have no interest in that. I don’t feel so impressed by someone that I must mimic them. It would cheapen me and what I want to stand for, which is my own individuality.

You do you and I’ll do me. That’s my motto.

But I’ve been unlucky. I’ve been unlucky because more than once, several times, in fact, people that I’ve called friends have done the one thing that I hate more than anything else. They’ve emulated me -even after knowing how I feel on the subject. They’ve crossed lines that have made me reject them.

It’s like these people don’t seem to understand that…

I don’t want a twin, and I don’t think being alike is “cute”.

I don’t want people creating variations of my nicknames for themselves. This isn’t a fucking club.

I don’t want so-called friends suddenly deciding to have a ‘thing’ for Human InuYasha because I do.

I don’t want to read someone else’s work and realize I’m actually reading my own (I’m sure you know what I mean).

I don’t want my so-called friends making a point of finding out who I commission so they can commission the same artists.

I don’t want them to copy my commission style down to the damn tattoos I put on my characters.

I don’t want them going behind my back like a fucking stalker, trying to become friends with everyone I know.

I don’t want them trying to find reasons to keep sticking to me when I’m clearly showing no interest.

I don’t want them emulating my websites, nor do I want them lurking at the places where I hold an account  for the sole purpose of stalking my movements.

Friends, real friends, respect boundaries. They don’t try to become a “mini me” who waits around to see what you’ll do next so they can do it, too. They don’t try to get chummy with the people you know -without receiving a proper introduction-  as if they’re part of a package deal.

What I’m saying probably sounds nuts, but I swear, everything I typed has already happened with several people who I’m no longer friends with. Hell, it’s happening right now with someone who can’t seem to see that I don’t want to be bothered. The minute I realize that a person is following me too closely, I want them gone. I’ve been plagiarized in pretty much every aspect in this fandom -while simultaneously being ridiculed as they steal from me- so the second I see someone’s ulterior motives, I’m done. I don’t need the bullshit, so here’s a clue:

I’m not fucking flattered by emulation because identity theft pisses me off.

So, my confession is that CUTS are coming.

/Confession.