Beyond Redemption

In my quest to find an array of horror movies for Halloween (and collecting many Asian ones \o/), I almost clicked on a link that I know would have changed my life. I don’t know if you ever heard of “3 guys, 1 hammer”, but I was unaware of what it really is. I thought it was a horror film, as it was mentioned in a horror list I was looking at. There was a link, and I nearly clicked it when a random comment on the list caught my eye.

“That’s a snuff movie.”

Talk about freezing in place. My throat felt like it was going to close as my hand inched away from the mouse. But to be sure, I talked to Kau and we found evidence that it was indeed a snuff film. Two, nineteen-year-old pieces of shit in the Ukraine killed 21 random people. Some of the murders were filmed with one being a man who was tortured with a hammer, screwdriver, and other things. All over Youtube there are “reaction” videos, and most begging others to never watch it. Keh. I don’t need a stranger to tell me that watching a snuff film will ruin my life and steal what little innocence is left in this jaded New Yorker. What I don’t get are the sick fucks who will watch it anyway or laugh about it.

For those who don’t know, a “snuff” film is a movie in which a real person gets murdered in front of a camera. It’s one of the most depraved acts a human being can do to another and I would never, ever engage in watching such a thing. I was sickened by the fact that I almost let that shit onto my hard drive, thinking it was a horror film.

So why am I upset? (Other than the fact that I nearly watched a murder?) Why is that shit on the internet where it can be downloaded and watched by anyone? One of those reaction videos I mentioned was done by a thirteen-year-old boy! Why the FUCK are things like that available to him with just a few clicks of a mouse?! I don’t like censorship, but my God there has to be a line! Who are the whack jobs passing that shit out like it’s Halloween candy for unsuspecting people like me?

I’m horrified and I thank God for sparing me from something that would have haunted me forever.

I miss using my blog. I love my forum – we have a blast there- but I love my blog, too. *Hugs my bloggy-blog* Anyway, I haven’t laid down a good old-fashioned rant in a while, and though I said I’d stop using my blog for personal shit, fuck it. It’s MY blog, am I right? lol.

Anyway, I hate sheeple. If you’re not familiar with the term, it’s a derogatory reference for people that just follow people/sites/places/things blindly. They have no true facts to back anything up, and they don’t have a true “cause”, and they don’t even know what the fuck they’re talking about most of the time. They talk because they need to be heard. You know the type.

They butt into your A and B conversation with unwanted, unnecessary bullshit because they want to be seen. They’re not offering anything useful because they don’t even know what you’re talking about. They just want to jump in and create drama for the sake of it, or because they’re bored, or stupid, or nosy, or whatever.

I’m a leader, not a follower. I always have been. I go against the grain all the time if it suits me and what I want to achieve. I care about people, and I will go out of my way to help or be supportive to a deserving person, but I’ll give an asshole my ass to kiss in a moment, usually by way of ignoring them. The internet gives people the luxury of being anonymous, but they use their anonymity to be pricks for no apparent reason other than internet pats on the back. *snort* Seriously? Get over yourself and your high schooler’s need to be accepted amongst your peers. It’s sad and laughable.

Is this about fandom? Not really. It’s a horse of a different color, but the overall pomposity of it is the same. People are obnoxious idiots most of the time. I mean, you think they are at first glance, but then they start talking and remove all fucking doubt. Butt-in-ski’s and bandwagon jumpers, in particular. I just can’t bring myself to care enough or be rude enough, to get all into something that has jackshit to do with me, especially with strangers. My time is too valuable. Sorry.

Now, on to other things!

I haven’t been writing, at least not very much. I have some health stuff going on and my head simply isn’t where it needs to be to achieve anything substantial. That’s why I have a new poll up. I’ve been thinking about those stories, in particular, and would like to update something that will garner a nice response. I mean, I love most of my fics and I’m going to finish them eventually whether anyone leaves a review or not, but I like making people happy when I can, so I want to update something that will do that until I have more time in my schedule and I’m feeling better able to write consistently again. Keep in mind, though, that the chapters will continue to be fairly short, especially right now when I’m under the weather. So vote, babes!

In other, other news!

I watched the BET awards on my DVR, and wow, I didn’t expect them to be so much fun! I’m not big on hip-hop, but I do like some songs and really took a liking to “Hands Up” by DJ Khaled, who closed out the show with a slew of guests, including T-Pain, Puffy and Busta Rhymes, and I had a blast. Even ran it back a few times.

But the highlight of the show was, of course, Chris Brown’s MJ tribute. That boy tore it APART, trust me on that. He broke down in tears by the end, though, during “Man in the Mirror” and the audience just loved it –so did I. It pisses me off that people are trying to say he faked that, used “eye drops” and other dumb shit. Look, get over that Rhianna bullshit. She’s busy man-hopping, so apparently, she’s definitely over it. But more to the point, he made a mistake, he’s paying for that mistake, and if people can forgive R. Kelly for pissing on children, I think a 21 year old kid (19 at the time) who lost his temper and fucked up can get a little break.

None of us were there when it went down, so we don’t know what set him off. People need to chill and let it lie. Now, am I condoning? Oh HELL no. I’m not a Rhianna or Chris Brown fan, but I am a woman, and what he did was fucking stupid and the lumps he took were deserved. But it’s been over a year, he’s kept his nose clean, he did whatever it was the judge told him to do in terms of punishment -leave it alone already.

And in closing…

I started a new diet and lost 20lbs. <.< That shit wasn't easy, either! And I miss cake! Wah! How about some Yasha? This chick is amazing! Her name is HitokiriSakura2012 and you can find her works on Deviant Art. her use of color is just awing.

Okay, so I don’t do a lot of Olympic sports. I cheer for America, of course, but I only have a few that I’ll actually watch -like figure skating/ice dancing. I love watching them, along with gymnastics (I gave snowboarding a whirl, too. GO SHAUN WHITE!). Those are my sports and I never miss them.

This time around, we had some American skaters, and they were lovely, but I fell head over heels for Kim Yu Na of Korea. That girl is beautiful, just stunning, and her skating was sheer perfection. And that’s coming from a HARD CORE AMERICAN who won’t root for another country over my own, period. This girl is so impressive, and moreover, just so much fun to watch! I lit my whole building up with screams when she not only won gold, but broke records. She’s all that and a bag of fucking chips!

But, it’s lonely at the top. As usual, because she won gold and her Asian counterparts feel “jipped” (Cause, ya know, if it ain’t Japanese, it ain’t right), all of sudden there are allllll these rumors that she’s had plastic surgery to make her more beautiful (since her counterparts are NOT) and to make her body longer. (So… are we to believe that they surgically implanted extra BONE to make her arms and legs longer??)

Let me start by saying how fucking insulting that is to the Korean people as a whole. I mean, really, are y’all trying to say that there’s NO POSSIBLE WAY a Korean girl could be pretty, or pretty to that degree?” o_O Because, in essence, that is what they’re saying. Coming out of their faces with shit like, “She must have had surgery because her skin is too smooth and perfect.”

OMFGWTF?!

It couldn’t possibly have anything to do with eating right and good skin care regimens, could it?? Perish the thought! Her limbs are long? That couldn’t have anything to do with height, and inherited bone structure, could it? Her body is like that of a model, but that would have zip to do with exercising, rigorous training, and a healthy diet, right?

Puhleeze.

But, let’s look at the flip side for a second. Let’s say that we insert bones into people all the time and she’s a complete mass of plastic surgery (I’ve seen the “before” pics. There’s no difference other than she was younger and less polished. But since she’s 19, I would like to think that hair, makeup, and plucked eyebrows would come naturally. *eyeroll*). Who fucking cares? Seriously, who but a bunch of SORE LOSERS and the supporters of SORE LOSERS would give a good goddamn if that girl went under the knife fifty million times? What the hell would that have to do with her ability to skate rings around her competition?!

The crybaby-ism of this is so reminiscent of fandom, the workplace, and school. Any time someone makes a name for themselves out here, they’re beaten down for no other reason than being. And God forbid they win any accolades along the way -it’s open fucking season from a bunch of whiny douchebags. That’s what she’s going through now, and that’s why I support her even more. They can’t knock her flow, so they go for a low denominator like looks. Well, thanks for telling the world that you fuckers feel inferior and threatened over ONE little girl. *snort*

Kim Yu Na has a new fan in me, surgery or not (Though I obviously don’t believe that shit) because she’s an underdog in a world that seems to only revere a certain type of Asian (and don’t paint me as anti-Japanese, either. You wouldn’t have a CLUE as to what you’re talking about. I just don’t like asshattery and won’t allow political correctness to silence me). Plus, she had a lot riding on this. Her country, sadly, acts ass backward with her and she had all kinds of threats of her sponsors dumping her and whatnot if she didn’t bring gold. She even revealed that the times she won silver, she got hate mail. She needed this win, and she EARNED this win, so these morons need to get over it. I hope she continues to thrive and these haters can eat the ice off her fucking skates!